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Answering Your Search Term Questions

On Jan 29, 2013 - 5 Comments - Lollygagging

There are few time-wasters more entertaining than crawling through the sometimes bizarre search terms people use to find their way to your website. In an effort to help out some of the lost internet wanderers that have ended up here looking for answers, I’ll tackle a few directly. All search terms sic.

140. “whete can i get hopshot in san diego?”

A true riddle, this one. I haven’t found any homebrew shops that carry them, so I’d try your nearest dispensary.

139. “what is the need of finance in modern times”

Good question, especially in light of the industry’s blithe disregard for business ethics. I say we do away with finance entirely and adopt a gift economy like the original Modern Times colonists.

137. “what is the apparatus that beer is brewed in called?”

A stainless steel cylindro-conical flux capacitor.

134. “use the facilities of an existing brewery to save money while brewing your beer”

This is called contracting or alternating proprietorship. Please don’t do it. There are a couple wine industry trends I’d love to see the beer world adopt, but this isn’t one of them.

97. “i will start brewery”

Damn right, you will. That’s the kind of determination I like to see.

84. “how much profit is there in a microbrewery 2012”

I’m probably not the guy to answer this since I haven’t made any money yet, but I would guess more than in 2011.

45. “cover letter ideas for working at a brewery”

I’ll answer this one seriously because I get a lot of cover letters. Save the “I’m super passionate about craft beer & I’m a homebrewer” stuff. Granted, I used that to land a job myself, but now every cover letter says it. If you’re looking for a job with Modern Times: 1) we’re not hiring right now, but any openings will be posted here on the blog, and 2) I want to know what specific skill sets you will bring to the company that I otherwise wouldn’t have on staff. It doesn’t have to be related to the job opening. For instance, if I’m choosing between two candidates for a packaging job, the candidate who has experience installing tiles, patching drywall, and working on HVAC systems is getting hired over the passionate homebrewer.

32. “beer malting system design specification list”

This person is smarter and more ambitious than I am.

26. “how much does it cost start brewwery”

I’m in the process of finding out. I’ll let you know in a few months.